OK, I confess. Up until today I've had a nanny. She found the nanny cam and quit.
Just kidding. We always planned to have someone around for 6 months, and LB will be 6 months old next week! S came four days a week from 9 to 3 since LB was about a month old. She has been a big part of our lives and we'll miss having her around. I would have loved to have her stay two days a week or so, but a girl's got to make a living, right? She starts with a new family tomorrow.
I'm excited to try to do this by myself. And nervous. I've had the chance to take a nap when needed, have lunch with a friend once in awhile, and grocery shop by myself. It has been a real luxury.
When LB was first born it took him about 90 minutes to eat. I was dead set on nursing him and it wouldn't have been possible without S's help with BB. How would I expect a one-year-old to sit around for over 8 hours a day? No way, Jose!
It's been a nostalgic day, beginning with a doctor's appointment with one of the nurse practitioners who performed several of our fertility treatments and who saw me in the hospital the day after LB was born. I remembered all the times I sat in the waiting room watching the pregnant bellies and cute little babies walk by, while longing for years for a child. Now I am the lady with the cute baby, and I always look out for that face that I wore for three years. I remembered the exciting ultrasounds and weekly appointments as we anticipated LBs arrival, and the post partum visit when my emotions were even more raw.
I went to grab a bite to eat on my last day of "freedom," and ended up at the restaurant where my friends D, K and I met when D and I told K that we too were expecting. We were all pregnant at the same time. Before going in I was trying to figure out why I felt so weird today. I guess S's last day paired with these other things made me really pensive.
So off I go, into the real world of motherhood where I actually have to take care of two kids at the same time. I'm being a little silly, because it's not like I took off every day for the spa and left S home caring for my children. Things should be a lot easier now that LB can sit up and BB can follow directions, at least to a toddler's extent.
Insert encouraging comments here ______________.
We're a happy little family of 5 who have been blessed. God has given us each other, our family and friends, and most importantly, with His only son Jesus who died for us. Jesus was adopted by Joseph, don't ya' know!
4 comments:
Amy, you are such a wonderful mom! I know after dealing infertility for years, that it's easy to romanticize thoughts of motherhood. I also know, those early days were not easy for you. I'm glad you were able to have help for a time while adjusting to being a mother of two. As always, you will be in my thoughts and prayers. I know you'll do great!
Piece of CAKE!
I'm either encouraging you, or I'm very hungry.
The many emotions of IF and motherhood.......
You can do it. Not that it's always easy (my BB boy knows when Mommy shuts herself in her room to leave her alone), but it can be done.
{{{hugs}}}
Alright here's one for ya. Nate and I lived with my parents for his first five 1/2 months. Tim was in training, and I was still working to save some money. So my mom nannied while I worked, and even slept in Nate's room at night so I could sleep for work. So when we moved to Alabama to be with Tim, I was TERRIFIED of doing it by myself, with Tim gone to work all day. And that was just ONE kid! Did I mention I was TERRIFIED? But, I figured it out, little by little, as you're forced to do. I cried the first day as I couldn't get Nate to stop crying and I couldn't pass him off to Granny. I called Mom crying and she sang to him on the phone, which seemed to help. But I was a mess for a little while. Now though, looking back, I treasure the months while I was home alone with Nate, and the grandfolks weren't here, and Tim was at work. Soon, I'll have two little ones, and I already miss those days. I feel very nostalgic when I think of them - I had never been happier than being alone with my baby. So, there you go, hope that is an encouraging word.
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