Sunday, October 30, 2005

The Adoption/Conception Myth!

Lovingly, I feel I must dispell this myth. Statistically, 5% of people who adopt a baby after years of infertility go on to conceive on their own.

It's fun - I hear this all the time. Then it's like a puzzle trying to figure out how to straighten out this misconception (ha ha, mis-conception - get it??) without sounding defensive. I know I have done this to some people now reading this blog. Guess what? I love you for wanting to comfort me with the hope that we could still get pregnant! It's much better than, "Maybe God does not mean for you to be parents." (No one has said that to me, but believe me it happens.)

I think every time I have mentioned in conversation that we are planning to adopt someone has said, "You know, my friend so-and-so got pregnant as soon as they decided to adopt. It happens a lot." IMHO, the main reason for this is, you never hear from the thousands of people who have adopted after infertility say, "You know, I adopted a baby and I never got pregnant. Can you believe it?" The sensational story always gets portrayed, doesn't it?

Of course it happens. It could totally happen to us. There is a chance that we might still conceive, as long as my lovely endometriosis stays at bay (not likely) and other prerequisite things keep happening (wink-wink). But there is also a chance that it won't happen. That's OK, too. (Did I say that??) Because God is in control and He gets to decide on these big ones.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways," says the Lord. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9

Can I get a witness?!?


Rachel C. said...

Someone DID say that to me..."Maybe God never intended for the two of you to be parents. I mean, you have stage IV endometriosis...I don't believe in coincidences." Can you believe that. I forgive her, but I don't think I'll ever forget it. The sounds of those words coming into my ears continue to cause me pain. Sometimes I even think, "What if she is right?". How crazy am I?

jnmthw said...

Hey sweet Amy!

This is Miriam. I was trying to reply to the pm you sent me. Thank you so MUCH for your blessed my day! I loved peaking at your blog. You and your dh are in my heart and prayers! Love always,
PS I will pm you later. The boards are down.

Amy T. S. said...

I got this one again today (twice!). Evey single time I tell someone we are pursuing adoption I hear this. Today I did not try to dispell the myth. I just smiled. Sometimes, you just smile.