I still get jealous of other women who are pregnant. It really makes no sense. I have two precious sons, and there was a time I wasn't sure we'd ever have children of our own. I'm so thrilled with my two sweethearts. My two boys are 1.5 and 2.5 and almost more of a handful than I can manage. We went through more than one straight year getting very little sleep, and it's all I can do to get these guys out of the house.
What do I want with a baby? Do I want a baby? I'm honestly not sure. I believe that I would be content with never having another child and with never having a little girl. I believe if we ever were to be expecting another baby I would be able to get totally on board with that, too, and be excited.
But if I'm so content, then why do I still get jealous when I hear a new pregnancy announced? Is it the attention the mom-to-be gets? Does it remind me of the days when hearing these announcements was devastating and make me hurt all over again? I don't think so. Is it because God has put the desire in my heart for another child or because I'm romanticizing pregnancy and babyhood?
I often wonder if fertile women feel this way, or if this is just an IF thing. Can you tell me? If you're a super-conceiver do you still feel envious of others' pregnancies? If so, when did this go away? Please tell me it will go away. I much prefer content to jealously.
If you think I'm crazy, believe me that's nothing that hasn't crossed my mind a million times before. Just keep that to yourself. ;o)