Tuesday, October 25, 2005

The Message

The message was that all things are possible for God! The preacher, a congregation member, told a true story about his young daughter (who I know from kid's choir) who had one in a series of many surgeries for a physical condition she has had since birth. The man asked the doctor, "How will we know if the surgery worked?" and the doctor replied, "Oh, you'll know immediately if the surgery was a success." Not so. Five weeks after the surgery she came home from school and told her mom, "I think everything is going to be OK now." Mr. S. and his family and friends had prayed and prayed that the surgery would work, and enlisted many church members to pray, too. The doctor was amazed when, in fact, the surgery had been a success, even though he had not thought it possible after 5 weeks of recovery.

This story probably meant more for me than for most because I know this precious little girl well from having her in choir 2 years ago. I also know her mom as a Mary Kay representative (which I am not), so I am invested in this family's life by association. But also, this was the first time in a long time that I have really had hope of what might be possible with God for our little family. I have always known that "all things are possible for God" does not mean that God will answer every prayer in the way we initially desire. This time, though, I truly felt like that was OK. Was our prayer that we would conceive a child and have a baby and did God said "no," or did we pray for a baby and God is saying "yes?" Maybe we did pray for a pregnancy and resulting baby and He said "no." And, ya' know what? That's fine. I have peace. Finally.

This isn't to say that I will never have another pang of "Why not us, Lord?" Or that I will never look at another pregnant belly and wish I could have one of my own (because I'll tell you what - I'm surrounded!), or that I will not continue to grieve not having a sweet baby made up of Randy DNA and Amy DNA. It's just to say that 1) it's still possible, although maybe not likely, and 2) I no longer have to rely on our own conception in order for us to receive God's perfect will and deeply love and cherish the soul who will be our baby, wherever that person is created.

It's hard to convey God's message after the fact, because at the time it was revealed to me the Holy Spirit was working intently in my heart on this very matter. Now I get to live with this beautiful reality for awhile.

I'm getting my socks blessed off these days.

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